Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Swedish for divorce

Jack and I are currently testing the boundaries of our relationship. I mean, we renovating our den. (FYI: the construction aspect is okay but assembling the IKEA entertainment unit was in fact Swedish for DIVORCE!)

The den was a horribly disgusting room all around. It had a horrid carpet and horrid paint and horrid wall paneling. In a nutshell it was very seventies - but not in the cool retro way – more like that *blech, shabby, gross way. Mental image for you: baby blue paint + dismal grey carpeting that had seen better days and then we got a puppy (need I say more) + icky wood paneling + an ancient old sliding patio door that was essentially broken so you had ease it open inch by painful inch to get outside. Sound nice?

Jack’s parents got us started by coming over and installing the new garden doors that we had sitting in our garage for over a year waiting to be installed. Of course, the doors were then too nice for the room so we were forced (in a good way) to continue the process. We tore out the carpet, painted walls, and are now installing the new laminate flooring. So far so good, knock on um, laminated wood type surface.

But of course the house is now in complete shambles. Furniture and loads and loads of crap are stacked randomly all over the kitchen and living room. Add the mix two dogs and two kids to and well it equals complete and utter chaos. Thus far, our relationship is holding and we haven’t had too many “disagreements” while working side by side in one room for 3 days straight – with mallets & power tools & and sharp pointy things. It was tense there a few times but we pulled through. Ultimately, I had to accept that due to my “lack of experience” with anything related to construction, that I would have to be delegated a bunch of lame-ass, crap jobs. Like: pulling staples out of sub-flooring, being a human paperweight, holding and passing tools, and shop-vaccing saw dust and other debris. On the plus side, I got to wear foamy purple kneepads.

Now for a little payback, much to Jack’s chagrin, I have advised him that the furniture we had in that room may be no longer good enough to remain in that room. In fact, said furniture may have to be demoted to basement furniture status. Though Jack is strongly “encouraging” me not to go off on any wild shopping tangents – I may have to pick up a few new items to spruce things up a bit…

I have a credit card and a computer – that combo makes me a dangerous woman indeed (insert maniacal laugh.)

Wish us luck & I hope to have some pictures to share soon!

34 Comments:

Blogger Angry Orange said...

IKEA swedish for divorce... LOL... kills me every time..

How ironic that you wrote this post and I read it on the same night that "The Amazing Race" had all their teams go to the ikea store to building or count something... Saw couples trying their best to building something fast I could only think of you and Jack doing the same... LOL too funny....

As was stated to me about home reno's "go slow, no need to rush" LOL - still painting the interior of my place been 5 months now... LOL...

Have fun with the reno's and furniture shopping!

11:53 AM  
Blogger Lexagirl said...

I hate Ikea! I was very close to signing Jack & I up for marriage counseling as a result of that stupid Ikea wall unit. It turned out that our assembly package was missing an entire shelf and several brackets. I can't wait to return the bloody thing and go to Sears.

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Blogger blackdaisies said...

oooohhhhh ... purple foamy kneepads and drool powertools ... I see a trip to Home Depot in my future, lol.

No where near the experience but Duke, Aiden and I got it into our head (okay Aiden and I) to make a tile art coffee table out of an old Ikea coffee table. Was great fun and managed to crack tiles, glue to table in pretty design and smear on grout over the course of the weekend. At which point Duke and I forgot we had a date to go out for drinks with friends. Came home Sunday at 11:00 pm to find groat dried on coffee table and spent next 3 hours painstakingly cleaning said groat off tiles. I could have used purple foam kneepads ;-) The coffee table is smashing though as I'm sure your new den will be ... looking forward to the pictures :) Hope you did a before and after a la Trading Spaces extravaganza, heh heh.

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This is assuming, of course, that the couple has not filed for divorce while shopping at IKEA.

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